41: Lets Get Naked... Together!

No one has contacted us with requests for naked photographs, either separately or together.  If you would like naked pictures and have been desperately trying to get in touch with us we can only apologise. Perhaps you have written the email address down wrong or something. The email to remember is DannAndMatt@BCFM.org.uk or call us on the usual number. either before, after or during the programme, which incidentally you can listen to or download (right click save link as)...by pressing

PLAY

Time for the...

Track Listings

'Escape from the Killing Fields' by Ice T
Escaping from killing fields is a lot more difficult if you are naked. First of all there tends to be mud and broken glass and stuff under foot. Second, you are super conspicuous and third, if nothing else, you really want to be wearing some kind of body armour in that kind of situation.
Little known fact: In the original draft of 'Die Hard' John McClane was naked and had a pathological condition that left him extremely turned-on by gun play. 


'Web in Front' by The Archers of Loaf
In the early 90's we ran out of band names and just started sticking random words together. The name of the song come from instructions yelled to Spiderman during an episode of the comic where he found himself naked, surrounded by mirror images of the green goblin and temporarily blinded by the faeces of a rhesus makak. This track is taken from the album 'Give him the bread fist!'   

'Fighting Trousers' by Professor Elemental
Steam. Hot water. Excited molecules released from the stifling bounds of electro-magnetic attraction.  Punk. Angry Teens. Excited pustules of hormonal interaction released from the bonds of societal expectation. Is it any wonder that the two of them would get together one day? Let me also add that the Professor is clearly naked at the beginning of this song. Naked and not alone.

For your consideration...
Mr B VS Professor Elemental
For a fair comparison you really ought to watch this too.


'Pink Roses' by GlassJaw
I'm just going to come out and say it. He's talking about labia right? I could be wrong. Maybe I've got the heating on too high and it's stopped my brain from functioning correctly. Maybe since I've been sitting here naked and surfing the internet for three solid days, I've lost all sense of what is beautiful in the world. Pink Roses.  


'Papa Was a Rodeo' by Magnetic Fields
Magnetism is difficult to explain, but not as difficult as this.
I love this song. It's sweet it's funny. It's about that all American pioneer/rodeo spirit. It's about a belly full of stims and a 4 hour deadline that's 8 hours and two states away. It's about adult nappies and the feel of skin on leather after 1600 miles in the same bucket seat.

Not everyone is called to drive the big rigs, but those that are, are owed a debt of gratitude.

'Ahh Men' by Say Anything
'Sea Men.' HA HA HA HA HA HA HA AH AHA HA AHA A. Or not. Matt asked me what I thought this song was about. I said it sounded like he was staring out of the tour bus window and 'feeling a bit religious.' Matt looked at me with scorn, he didn't like the glib simplicity of my reply. He wanted something more thought out. True story.
Let me ask you something... Is it easier to be closer to god if we don't allow our clothes to get in the way? Perhaps it is. Perhaps combined with Nelly this is the central message of global warming.

'Too Much' by Sufjan Stevens
I have already spent too much time writing up this weeks offering. I was supposed to go swimming hours ago. I should be showering off right now, I should be facing that particularly English issue of if it's OK or not to remove ones swimming trunks in the presence of strangers. Instead I am still here, still typing. Nude

'Sort of Like Being Pumped' By Bomb the Music Industry
I'm gonna give you the naked truth on this one. I don't think that the title of this song is an allegory to sex. It seems to be about being inside a train. Which is kind of like being water inside a pump. i think that's the connection. If you don't believe me here are the lyrics.  Goodnight, 

16: The Musrooms of Love.

We have never played the GLC on this programme but I promise that we will as soon as they release the almost inevitable cover of Newyork State of mind, called Newport State of Mind. It doesn't exist yet, but I'm pretty sure it will within a year or so.

You can listen to this classic laughter filled GLC free episode HERE

'May 16th' by Lagwagon 
The Lagwaggon has three wheels, is pursued by Cherokees but continues to roll along. on May 16th 1836 – Edgar Allan Poe married his 13-year-old cousin Virginia. If that happened now he'd be hounded out of the country like Roman Polanski. Edgar was a dark dude too man. I worry about the fate of poor Virginia, by the time she was 19 she would have been seriously jaded.

'Classy' by Kenickie 

It's not a good song... but is is sung by the lovely
 Lauren lovely Laverne. I know it's weird 
but I like to imagine Lauren just 
going about here day, perhaps collecting nesting
 material or stock piling food for the harsh
 winter ahead. She now has her own six music 
Show and presents the highly pretentious 
Culture Show on the BBC. 
All about British Culture.

'Hidden Track from Science' By Incubus

This is possibly the greatest track we ever have or 
will play on the ETP. The whole ETP crew is 
really excited about it. So much so that the they 
started running from one side of the boat to the 
other and eventually the whole thing capsized. 
Word to the mother!

'The Book of Love' by Magnetic Fields 

Imagine if the book of love was a set text on 
your sixth form syllabus... It's always there as an 
informal subject. I remember using Pride and 
Prejudice in order to pull girls. 
It never worked particularly well. 
Girls read all the Judy Bloom stuff. That's how

 come they get the head start. 
We boys just end up twisted and weird. 

The Razer by Head Automatica  

Head Automatica, feature the singer from 
Glass Jaw and one of the producers from 
Gorillaz and other stuff. I guess that makes them 
some kind of 'Super Group' Supper Group, Lunch 
Singers. Breakfast Club. Club Sandwhich. 
oh dear, this is starting to sound like Mallet's Mallet. 
I've met Timmy Mallet, he came into my day-job 
radio station. I had to make him a cup of Tea. 
He likes it strong with two sugars and no milk.

'Blue Blood' by Foals 

I really like this song, but I get the feeling Matt 
could take it or leave it. I guess that is kind of the 
point of the show. We're not supposed to actually 
like each others music, but I think our shows are 
usually better when we do. I think I like this song 
because it reminds me of the band James but it's 
a bit funkier. Matt doesn't have a drivers licence.

'You're Gonna Break my Heart' by Malcolm Middleton

Poor Malcolm stuck between a rock and a hard place. 
He fears a broken heart but worries that if he finds true 
happiness, then he will no longer be able to write songs 
that are any good. Then he starts to worry if the songs are 
any good anyway. It's Lose-Lose for the Artistic Scottsman.

'Peaches' by The Presidents of the USA 

I could never figure out of this song was dirty or not.
 I mean there are obviously 'Peach Eating' references. 
But where does that figure on the profanity scale next to 
say... 'Walk this Way' by Run DMC? or  'put e'm on the glass'
, Sir Mixalot's  lesser known follow up to Baby got Back. 
Not very highly I suspect.

Sorry about the formatting... things went weird, for some reason. 

Goodnight. (allow the app.)

8: The massivley rare... Lost Episode.

You can hear this famous Lost episode Here

This episode was swallowed by a Narwhal and only re-surfaced when the horny beast was captured by a group of gorilla fisherman (hoping to use the vast profits available from poaching rare animals for the 'Chinese medicine' trade to fund terrorism.) With help from various charities, we were able to give them £700 for the chewed up tape. Enough to save one whole Rhino from needless slaughter.


'Getting down with it' By The Kills
What do you do when the world is so appalling and disgusting and just plain vomit inducing that you just can't take any more? I suggest you take a leaf out of The Kills' book, change your name to Hotel and just Get down with it. In other words face the music and dance. Dance until you stray over a landmine and lose one of your legs. Dance until a child dies from a preventable illness. Rest for a moment in quiet contemplation and then start dancing again.

'Text Message' by Dann's Phone
My phone went off during this episode. I thought at one time that I might like to make a joke out of it. I have since changed my mind about that.

'Unprotected Sex with Multiple Partners' by Against Me! (Featuring Brendan Something, perhaps Brendan Kelly)
So Matt played this track by the Florida Punk band that is no longer legally allowed to give blood. According to rumour and hearsay the lead singer has now contracted chlamydia, the bassist has hepatitis and the drummer uses protection.

'The Luckiest Guy on the Lower East Side' by Magnetic Fields
This is a song sung by a man to a woman (I think a woman) that is very attractive. Sort of like a Mary figure in Something About Mary. He has a car.
Magnetic Fields are kind of awesome. I got this song from the album 69 Songs About Love. Five of those songs are about a minute long and I used them to time a section of my work out routine designed to Max Out core body strength. It's called the Plank.


'Ah Ha' by The Butthole Surfers
I so wanted this to be this or even This. The later of those two links was made by a friends of mine called Pete Simson. He booked out a Cinema, got the employees to pretend to be the audience, took his girlfriend there under the pretence of a regular date and then showed the video and proposed. She said yes!

'Furr'by Blitzen Trapper
Damn you Blitzen Trapper. Damn you for getting lucky with this track. I guess this track just proves that if enough chimps bash out enough words that rhyme, they might be able to create a decent song. That's what those old trapper boys did with this little ditty. Sadly I doubt they'll ever do it again.

'I Will Play' by Brand New
Yet another track about dying alone. I think Matt Plays these tracks because he's not married like I am. I don't have to worry about dying alone. I can rest assured that millions will watch me die: on a big screen in Times Square, with cheerleaders and a marching band.

'Jezebel' By Num

Here is a link to Num's Amazing Website

These are the lyrics to Jezebel, which if you have in front of you as you listen to the track will really help.

Counting the clouds passing over the sun
Laid in the shade we always had fun
Soon came the day when you'd make your own way
Wonder if somewhere you dream of the old days

Sun sister sun how it shined on the water
Soaked to the skin in the longest of summers
My little jezebel was ripe for the strangle
Sun in her eyes her hair in a tangle

Counting the leaves as they blew past the window
Wondering if somewhere you felt the way I do
My little jezebel I light you a candle
Sun in your eyes your hair in a tangle

I think that they're good lyrics.

'Enfilade' by At the Drive In

If you were to employ Enfilade at a Drive In you would be immediately arrested and rightly so.


Good night everyone. The Whale has been saved!